People change, day by day, evolving from who they were into who they are.
On the other hand, people's views of other people are much more static and lagging, being, as they are, composed of a series of encounters separated by time. I will forever be a little surprised that my younger brother is taller than me, because the last time I *lived* with him, he was eight. Since he's twenty-six now, he's substantially different.
Anyhow, you know what you're like, because you're around you all the time. You know the subtle shifts in your life, when you cross the line from "in love" to "this is the one for forever" - but that could be a lot harder for people who are in less constant communion with you to detect. And even when something's been that way for a while, not everyone goes around updating their internal concept of other people all the time.
A wedding is a good way of announcing "this is who I am, who we are, *now*" - but it doesn't require an implication that yesterday was different.
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Date: 2004-10-11 06:38 pm (UTC)On the other hand, people's views of other people are much more static and lagging, being, as they are, composed of a series of encounters separated by time. I will forever be a little surprised that my younger brother is taller than me, because the last time I *lived* with him, he was eight. Since he's twenty-six now, he's substantially different.
Anyhow, you know what you're like, because you're around you all the time. You know the subtle shifts in your life, when you cross the line from "in love" to "this is the one for forever" - but that could be a lot harder for people who are in less constant communion with you to detect. And even when something's been that way for a while, not everyone goes around updating their internal concept of other people all the time.
A wedding is a good way of announcing "this is who I am, who we are, *now*" - but it doesn't require an implication that yesterday was different.